Monday, March 13, 2006

Attaining balance....

....I would find this so much harder without Nath. He is one of the only people on this planet who can read my mood and know how to respond to either make me kak myself laughing or realise I am taking myself way too seriously (and then kak myself laughing)...rarely does he offend me.
AND this man....he gets to see all of the worst of me {and all of the best too, thankfully}.

I am feeling a lot more balanced than I was a few weeks ago...I think this has EVERYTHING to do with boot camp and pilates....
Even has me back to some of my healthier habits without even trying....drinking much more water, my herb teas {which I do so adore almost as much as coffee}. Could still do some more work on making fresh juices in the morning...but I gotta tell ya, getting out of bed is hard at times.....I can only see 6am so many times in one week....not practically every morning...I just can not ! Does this make me a bad person? I hope not.

Jeez we expect a lot from ourselves....SO MUCH....I have my "family schedule"....I wish I could stick to it, but then I would be a robot. I like balance...yep I do. But not at the expense of my personality....of who I am.

Lovely things occuring lately get me into a state of excitement where I am giggling, and talking a million miles, and jumping from one subject to another and back again constantly {actually that is usual}.....but very high energy.

Nath told me yesterday that I am intense...and he meant it in a good way, called me his "little explosive woman like no other" ...he was grinning and laughing at the way that I:

  • have to have things done particularly (in my own special way...like us all I know - but we all have our own special way - and it takes that certain special person to appreicate them...and not find them annoying {and I found mine....*grin*})
  • fly off the handle for small things {such as half a bottle of vanilla coke spraying all over my just cleaned wooden floors....or exposing a roll of film and throwing it across the kitchen at Kaela's birthday celebrations...ranting and raving infront of our guests (much to Nath's horror at the time} but then just as quickly I am over it...laughing and enjoying myself again
  • am passionate about SO many things - sometimes I get so excited Nath (and Kim) have to remind me to breathe....

What do I think of these traits? Well I guess sometimes it is infuriating to me and those I love, but I put it down to my Italian heritage....even though I only have a very small portion of Italian in me {my grandmother is a Lazzarini...Milanese}.... I think my living in Italy for a year (in Perugia) certainly made me feel very much at home....and concreted for me that the very small portion of my Italian blood.....is a very large portion of my personality...
These thoughts are compounded by ShopGirls 2 showing again on SBS at the moment - and I LOVE IT....except it makes me {home} sick for Italy...for home is where the heart is and my heart is definately imbedded there. What I mean is....in Italy everyone is passionate...everyone is so full of life, and expression and well just living to the brink. In Australia....our society considers that kind of behaviour to be "hormonal" or "kooky"....tis sad, and I guess that is why I will always want to return to live my life in Italy..............aaahhhhhgggg {*huge sigh and grin*}
And Mikaela was conceived in Perugia (the city where Baci chocolates are made).........and that makes it all the more perfect to me.
Anyway I totally digress with this post, my intention was to share with you my thoughts on how I am attaining balance.........or maybe balance is just another term for acceptance which is more important. Embracing who we are and what makes us uniquely special in this great world of ours. High energy and all.

BTW...I have another belief that there are few special friends of mine...who may not have Italian blood, or have not been yet....but definately have lived there in a previous life...they too are SO Italian {big grin}.....
Bx

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