Layouts galore...

So these are just a few of the *43* layouts I did this past weekend at the Creative Memories Scrap Retreat... Some are recent and some are from 2004 (I am a bit behind... in my scrapping, dont imagine I will ever be UP-TO-DATE, and that is okay) !!

I love to scrap... I really, really do! I love to scrap! (**Thats for you Kyles... GO Justine Clarke and her addictive kiddy tunes**) I actually really love her tunes... a lot. Lucky for Kaela.

Also I have updated my Gallery if you want to check it out....
Creative Joy
Bx

Something to consider....

You're not an isolated island. You're a piece of the planet, a piece of the universe. Personal relationships are the fertile soil from which all advancement,all success, all achievement in real life grows. THE DAILY GURU

I feel best when all my relationships are going well, aligned... feeling good and right... and if they are not I will do whatever I can to make them so.

And those I can not make better... well I am learning it is okay to let them go. If they come back, well and good and if not - same really - I have more energy to put into the things that are worthwhile.

JOY breeds JOY... and the same about MISERY too. Gotta be careful about that one. Tho sometimes we need to do that also... company is vital at times of heartache and healing.

Lately I have been connecting with some amazing true souls... and I feel so good for it. I feel JOY about these friendships. Whatever the mood.

And the JOY expressed in Tara, Em's and Cathy's posts bring GOOD GOOD tears to my eyes! Me and my girls are kinda like that about scrapping (when everyone is in a bloody decent mood).... just without the fame and freebies - D'Oh. I love my girlfriends... I love to share the scrapping and photography joy with them.

It is all about the peeps. This life of ours.
Peace and Love
Bx

Love 2 Live

My dear, mother earth, gorgeous friend Vanessa.... is a Life Coach. Check out her site!
Bx

Belly laughin' so hard....

SO SO hard. This boy is such a card.... a real hoot. He had his brother {TOTALLY angelic...Lachie}, Mikaela and I in stitches for at least half an hour yesterday. Kaela was even dribbling. In the end we were all laughing so hard that he went to dob on us to his Mum!!! I think he realised we were laughing AT him and not with him. I then went upstairs to explain to my dear friend, Kyles... the antics of her second born. But I was still laughing so hard that I could barely get the words out. Kyles informs me... the boys do it all the time....

The general gist of Cam's performance is this.....
Cam would career down a {small} hill atop a small bike. Lachie would put another small bike in his path and Cam would crash... kinda softly (he never hurt himself.... I dont think!) He did this for our entertainment a few times. And from the top of the hill he would yell down to us "okay get ready to laugh" And laugh we did!

On the last decent... he ran (no bike) - and lost a gum boot. It was then that I totally lost it. Pure, golden slap stick comedy.... I thought I was going to pee myself I was laughing so hard. Cam was muttering to himself about losing his boot {which only made us laugh more}... and that is when HE lost it and went to tell his Mum!!

I am a "three stooges" kinda humour gal... lame but highly amusing! I am also not someone you should trust to take care of your children!

At 3am this morning Kaela awoke, upset and wanting her Mama, so I hopped into bed with her.... As I lay beside her all warm and snuggly a thought came into my mind and I chuckled. Kaela turned to me and said "Mum are you laughing about...." And I knew that she knew why I was laughing... and we started laughing again !! "when Cam was running down the hill.... and Lachie put the bike in front of him, and he fell over"....

Oh my lordy Cam is such a hilarious boy..... so so funny. And sweet... did I mention is he SO sweet! And check out the boyz adorable sister! She is just like her Mum.

We had a lovely day yesterday with Kyle and her clan.
Just Being on a sunny winter day. No school, no work... no demands!

And playing with the QuicKutz {I am gonna get myself one of them, it is brilliant}.... I am SOLD! My plan - I will use the money I would have spent on ciggarettes.... put it aside. Once I have saved enough I can buy this as a reward. Then each time I use it - I will have a postitive affirmation - a reminder that hard work is rewarded. And a continued reminder for the improved lifestyle I am enjoying due to good decision making....
Bx

Tanti Aguri e Kim...

Happy Birthday to my dear friend Kim.... have a wonderful day beautiful !

Bx

We just watched....

The Constant Gardener.... totally ripped my heart out {as all movies based in Africa tend to do} and deepened my desire and resolve to one day work in Africa and to aid all those very beautiful innocent people. Victims of greed.

Oh look I am not even going to begin to place my feelings about Africa here. Or anywhere really. I am just not. I dont talk about it to anyone ... Ever... It is just way too absurdly heart breaking for words. But one day I will share with the most important Goddess in my life.... my daughter. Mikaela.
My chest is totally aching... heavy and sore. I am so sad. So, so Sad... but I know I can turn that into assistance one day and I will live there for maybe six months, or a year... and I will do what I can to help.
Bx

This weekend I felt very rich...

"No one can tell whether they are richer or poor by turning to their ledger. It is the heart that makes a person rich. One is rich according to what one is, not according to what one has."-- Henry Ward Beecher

I had a beautiful weekend. A very productive weekend. I completed some *43* 12x12 layouts. Wowsers. I will post a couple soon, and add the rest to my gallery. IT IS ALL ABOUT ORGANISATION {and perhaps a little passion} I was SO organised this weekend... I even won a Creative Memories gift for my efforts *lovely*

It was a great weekend ~marinating in my scrapbooking~ and my progress as a "Life Artist"... I got creative with the paints and I am really happy with the results.

It was a relaxing and enjoyable weekend spent with some beautiful and talented women. Eating ( a LOT), chatting and just BEING. I spent most of the weekend... just being. So that was lovely. Nothing else to do except Scrap and Be... all weekend. Really blissful I gotta say. A must annual event from now on. Recharge and energise.

Then I came home to my man who had missed me *cute* so, that he bought me some flowers *sweet* !!

And tomorrow there is a strike at Kaela's school... so me and my girl are going to hang with Kyle and her clan. Fun times.

And it is Kimmy Bimmy's birthday!

Life could not be better. I hope you had a beautiful weekend too.
Joy and Peace.
Bx

Its not You ... its Me....

Oh my goodness.... I have had SUCH a revelation. It almost seems silly - things that are SO OBVIOUS, that dawn on me! I get so excited when I have "figured it out"... because then I can act upon it... I can change.

"Change. It has the power to uplift, to heal, to stimulate, surprise, open new doors, bring fresh experience and create excitement in life. Certainly it is worth the risk." -- Leo Buscaglia

Absolutely, I totally agree or I would not be here today as I am. I am happier in my life, within MYSELF than I have ever been... I have a gorgeous child. A wonderful man. And a beautiful sisterhood... All my meaningful relationships today are rock solid, more so than I have ever had before in my life.

So as happy as I am within myself, with my life and my love, my relationships - I was left bewildered as to why I continued to allow toxic people impact me....why oh why? Finally after much contemplation, I worked it out - I was seeking to replicate the relationship I once had with my Mum... D'oh!

It is SO obvious to me now! I would seek these love/hate "friendships"... I would counsel them over and over again on the same issues... like a never ending merry-go-round. I would feel sympathy and empathy... which would drain me - turning into anger and frustration. At myself. Why was I doing this? They would criticise me ... or just be plain nasty to me because they felt so crap about themselves. Even criticise me for giving them what I knew to be sound advice. And asides... if you dont like advice given... don’t take it! Why did I put up with this crap? They were not DOING anything to me.... I was ALLOWING. WHY? It was getting to me... and Nath could see it was upsetting me. Ohh..... I wanted off the merry-go-round…

Now I have worked it out, I am off. I feel such a sense of release and a calmness... I am not going to continue to allow toxic people to impact on my happiness. Simple. Even when I love them, as I do my Mum, and other friends I have said goodbye to. I refuse to have negative people in my life. And where I am "forced" to... I will no longer be harmed by their pain and suffering. I can just be compassionate. And self-protecting... their issues are theirs. So there you go peeps - another little epiphany for me. Clarity. Keep it simple.

"I can change. I can live out my imagination instead of my memory. I can tie myself to my limitless potential instead of my limiting past." -- Stephen Covey

And it is going to take continued work... as we know self improvement does. And I intend on doing so for the rest of my life. Yah! I have always embraced change, self analysis and improvement. So I am looking forward to the required changes as I grow into this new revelation.

Want to share any huge "revelations" you've had?

See my post below... this is how I am feeling now... face to the sun. And looking forward to a great weekend.
Peace and Love.

Bx

Going Scrapping...

With my gals, Kyle and Kim (and loads of other scrapping nutz)... I can not wait !! Two nights in the bush... scrappin! Relaxing. Joy. Blissful surrounds and ... bush walking. Escape.

"There is no end. There is no beginning. There is only the infinite passion of life."-- Frederico Fellini

Of course I will miss my guy tremendously... but not as much as he will miss me. 'Cause I will be in scrapping heaven.... and he will be bored without me to pester *hehe*..... actually I can not remember when we last spent two nights apart *sigh*....

Almost packed and ready to go.... just one more day of work!
Peace and Love
Bx

Its the little things....

like this evidence that he has been talking with me while I have been scrapping.

Those ribbons would have been all over the floor and my draft table.
I could have been stepping on them.
If I did happen to notice.. I would have just left 'em there. Until clean up time - and that could be hours, days, or even weeks away.
{You can just close the door you know *grin*}

But on one of the numerous times that Nath comes in to chat with me.
He would have bent down and picked them up... one at a time.
He would have wrapped it into a ball.
And placed them here next to each other.
All in a row.
Together.

And THAT is just one other very teeny tiny reason that I love this man.
With all my heart and soul...
G R A T E F U L !!!
Bx

Reflective days....

I seem to have a bit of a theme going on at the moment. So I am going to run with it. Let me elaborate. We know that the most important thing in life is love of the self. If you have that. You have everything. Self acceptance does not mean attaining perfection. We are not perfect.

When your life is just as you always dreamed it would be...and you are happy within. Happy with your life and who you are. And not just a temporary happiness... but a real calm, content and peaceful feeling deep in your soul. Your life is just as you want it to be. And you love yourself and are making decisions accordingly.

Guess what - you are STILL gonna have a bad day every now and again.

There are two kinda bad days.....

1. One you have control of - you realise you made some bad decisions. Perhaps not for the first time....
2. The other you can not control - a death or something along those lines - this is not something you decided.

You CAN however decide how to react to the situation, regardless of which type or circumstance lead to the "bad day" or "blue mood"....

Honour yourself by going through the process and feeling the gamut of emotions... dont just push them aside, or bury them deep down.
Most importantly... be honest with yourself.
Peace and Love
Bx

Goodluck my love...

He knows what for.
I love you babes.
Bx

Seriously folks...

I dunno... I mean I love positive affirmations. My resolve to grow and be grateful everyday. But you know what... that is not actually possible. Nah, ah! And my nearest and dearest who read this must sometimes think... "what did she smoke today?" Because I am no "Guru"... I have no answers as such. Surprised aren’t you!

Don’t get me wrong... I am not saying "throw your arms in the air... forget about trying to be a better person... each and every day". I'm just saying... it is okay to have a “bad day” every now and again. That is a part of "Just Being"... no?

Balance... mmm especially for the creative is an illusive state to achieve. And I am not sure I even want to UNLESS balance = acceptance. Self acceptance. Including the yucky and hard bits... because you know what - its part of me. And me as a whole package... well I am pretty fine I think!! In all my varied moods that make up who I am ... that enable me to offer so much as a partner, a mother and friend... there are times when I drive them (and myself) a little nutty. Yep I do. And that is the beauty of life... of living.

But BALANCE - if that means… being so "balanced" that you had the same cheerful reaction no matter what someone says to you... "I just found your cat run over"... Response: “Oh that is fantastic, really great *grin, grin*”
... NO THANKYOU...

Life is not "balanced"... the experiences thrown our way... are not even keeled.

That is the beauty of life, no? And surely you have figured out a few things, no?

A few things that triggered this rant:

1. An entry in my 2004 diary about sculpting.. which I am now enrolled in and begin next term... sometimes we progress s l o w l y - and that is okay.
2. My sweet friend... Expecting herself to always be strong and "get over it". Such a darling heart!
3. Her super busy and "crazy" life making perfect sense... totally cracks me up.
4. Her raw and honest blogging. Totally REAL. I love these gorgeous, strong, brave and honest women who can express themselves so poetically!! Amazing.
5. Her blogging style, sometimes I actually feel I have ADHD just reading it... very kewl and fun.
   

Life is a rollercoaster... you gotta ride it.
Peace and Love within .... then everything else just falls into place.
No matter what happens you have your rock.
You.
Bx

Happy Monday...

Soooo.... got heaps of layouts "organised" for the retreat.
And actually managed to only "near complete" one or two of them... there was sewing and then printing out the journalling...and it was done.

Seriously... this total approach to organisation is fantastic. I can have all my layouts sorted like this by the end of the week. THAT will be so kewl.

Every day, passion speaks to us through our feelings. That's why when you allow yourself to become anesthetized by what others think, you literally block yourself from living the life you were called to live.
I promise you that if you make a choice that doesn't please your mate, your friends, your other, or whoever, the world will not fall apart -- the people who truly love you want you to love yourself. And as you become clearer about who you really are, you'll be better able to decide what is best for you -- the first time around.

Oprah Winfrey

I got that from the Ali ... she is terrific. I am so happy to be meeting her soon..... it is going to TOTALLY ROCK. {just a little excited}

Have a beautiful day peeps.
Bx

LBS...

Leonie has introduced to me to this very kewl term..."Lazy Bastards Sunday" (or weekend as the case may be). That is not to suggest I never had them BL (Before Leonie)... oh I did (and do)... just didnt have a term ... and now I do! I really love it.

Mind you I am not exactly being lazy... in fact I am being super productive. But it is a fun kinda productive and it is not an obligation! I have NOT A ONE obligation today... JOYIO! So I am sorting my scrapping stuff for a retreat this weekend... two whole nights hanging with the girls... scrapping. Heavenly.

This is it so far.... this will become "super orgainised" kit style format for about 40-50 layouts (yes... there is much MORE than this!) I still need to do. This includes sketches, embellishment packs and journalling. Fantasimo. Perhaps I will only need to take one bag to the retreat. THAT will be nice. AND if it takes me a couple of hours each night this week to hone the packs, thats good, then I wont scrap 'em before the retreat.

But of course I will not actaully complete all these pages over the weekend... they however, will be ready to do at any time in the future. Kewl.

Cause I am one of those peeps who only like to do the NOW stuff... especially when the now stuff is going so well... and some of the OLD stuff holds some unhappy and unpleasant memories. But they need to be done. They are part of my journey. And having them ready to go makes it easier to do them... not have to think about them too much. Just get them done, with honesty and paint *grin*...

So that is my LBS plan ... and perhaps coax my man to take a walk into Manuka... and grap a coffee before the sun goes down.

I hope you all have beautiful Sunny Sunday's too.
Bx

My kooky hidden hippy....

Is being unleashed. Or perhaps it is that I am just: Being Me. Loving Me. Accepting Me. I am focusing on eliminating the unnecessary from my life. Such as negative energies, experiences, behaviours... situations. To let go of things that do not make me happy, or serve me and my family. Things that do not serve the life I have created and want to continue nurturing.
To squash the critical inner voice ~ it is SO not required. Or at least I am trying.... some days ARE tough. Growing comes with a certain amount of growing pains, however I am keeping in mind that the pain should not outway the growth. To be CONSCIOUS of what I am DOING... how I am behaving...

I feel I am growing spiritually with an intensity at times is a bit scary. But a good scary. And the more I honour myself and my journey... the more I am attracting likeminded souls and the tools to assist me.

The following quotes from Daily Guru really resonated with me this week that I think you will like too:

Getting down to essentials
"Besides the noble art of getting things done, there is the noble art of leaving things undone. The wisdom of life consists in the elimination of non-essentials." -- Lin Yutang

Do you feel a desire to simplify your life?
If you say ‘yes,’ then set an intention to reduce the demands, stimuli, interruptions and busyness in your life. We each have the power to do this – we simply have to begin to say ‘no’ to those activities that don’t directly serve what we want for our lives.

Everyone of this planet deserves to have some free time to think, relax and have fun. If you long for this, begin now to clear your plate and allow a new level of experience to happen in your life. Take charge. Eliminate time wasters. Make some decisions about what matters to you.

"The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak." -- Hans Hofmann

Imprisoned By Your Thoughts?
"Problems exist only in the human mind." -- Anthony de Mello
For most of us, there’s always a long ‘to do’ list. That’s a fact. And it’s easy to feel victimized. ‘Poor me!’ That’s not a fact – that’s a choice. Experiment with your life to explore how much your mind is your jailer. Simply let go of the ‘oh woe’ kinds of thoughts. Silence your mind. Be right here, right now. Decide what you will do now and do it, without buying in to the mind’s sob story. When one task is done, you can then choose another. Allowing the mind to agonize about the size of the ‘to do’ list just makes us tired before we even get started. It doesn’t have to be this way.

"Don't water your weeds." -- Harvey Mackay

Visit this link to receive your own daily messages from TheDailyGuru

And enjoy.
Peace and love.
Contentment within.
Bx

Winter means Flannies....

Flannelette pyjamas... is there anything better in winter? No.

And is there anyone cuter than my cheeky little monkey wearing em? Nope. Not to me.
Bx

Sometimes I don't fight fair....

And nor does He.

If we have an argument... a totally SILLY dispute.
I always go too far.
And end up with this {or something like this}:

Some say love, it is a river, that drowns the tender reed
Some say love, it is a razor, that leaves your soul to bleed
Some say love, it is a hunger, an endless aching need
I say love, it is a flower, and you, its only seed


Its the heart afraid of breaking, that never learns to dance
Its the dream afraid of waking, that never takes the chance
Its the one who won't be taken, who cannot seem to give
And the soul afraid of dying, that never learns to live

When the night has been too lonely and the road has been too long
And you think that love is only for the lucky and the strong
Just remember that in the winter, far beneath the bitter snow
Lies the seed, that with the sun's love in the spring becomes the rose.
:::Bette Midler:::

(And yes, he typed it out for me in red!)

Oiiiiwwww... this man is totally my match. And in the sweetest, nicest, best way I have ever known.
My Soul Mate... My Love... Nath.
Thanks for reminding me when I forget... not to sweat the small stuff and always be grateful for the big stuff.
Bx

She looks like gold to me....

You look like gold to me, and I'm not too blind to see.
Oh, you look like gold.
Said, you look like gold.
And you make me want to sing with all the joy you bring.
Oh, you look like gold.
Oh, you look like gold.
Like the rays down from the sun when a new day has just begun.
You look like gold.
You look like gold.
And now, look here 'cause, I've been fooled before,
But now I know, I've made the mistake in the past,

But now, now I know the difference from gold, from gold and brass.
It's not the kind of gold that you wear but the kind that can feel my care.
Oh, hey, you look like gold.
Oh, now you look like gold.
Some shine when the day is new but they fade when the day is through.
But not you, you look like gold.
I said, you look like gold
Oh but, but I've been wrong before,
But now I know I've made the mistake in the past,
But now, but now, I know, Now I know, now I know,
Now I know the difference from gold and brass.
You look like gold to me, and now I'm, I'm down on a bended knee.
Oh, you look like gold.
Oh, you look like gold.
And I just, I just want you to know,
To me you mean so, so, so much more than all the gold.
Oh, you look like gold.
Oh, you shine like gold.
Said, you look like gold.

Ben Harper

Bx

Katie has a blog....

Check it out here.
There is also a link to Kate's WebPage (detailing her surprise arrival 3 months early, through to her departure from hospital on 19 December 2005 at ... 70 days of age).

So her blog is a NOW account of how beautiful little Kate is doing...
Enjoy.
And I know I already posted this photo in this entry, but I love it... had to post again!
Bx

My public holiday Monday....

Involved the best kinda ME time:

I went to the national gallery of australia.... nga.
I parked the car in the underground car park.
I reapplied my lip gloss.
I put my crumpler and camera over my shoulder.
I headed out to the sculpture garden.
The Carillon was playing... welcoming me.
The sun was shinning.... warming me.
And I felt grateful.
And peaceful and calm.
I took some photos.
I sat on the edge of the lake.
I watched the sun glimmering over the water.
I watched people walking by.
I smiled.
I felt happy and content.
I wandered through the garden.
I took more photos.
I watched some birds playing, splashing... darting about.
I took more photos.
I was mesmerised staring at beautiful sculptures.
And his work.
I sat, I crouched, I stood... and took more photos.
I breathed slowly and deeply.
I sighed, big heavy sighs... contented sighs.
I took more photos.
I went to the misty garden.
The garden where fairies live...
I eavesdropped on children speaking to their parents...
"It's so special"
"It's misty and floaty"
I continued to smile.
I sat.
I relaxed.
I meditated.
I felt grateful.
And blessed.
To Be ME.
Bx

Little Katie...

Nath, Kaela and I went to visit Mel, Drew and Kate today.
It was so sweet to see her again... with her blue eyes, big smiles, some baby babble and giggles.
Kate was born 3 months early... nine months ago, but naturally she is "technically" six months of age and doing really well.

Mikaela was OF COURSE totally inlove with her... and rather too much at times...

But Mum and Dad were totally kewl with it, though Kate was struggling a bit!
Beautiful Mum and bub....

Afternoon tea, coffee and cake, catching up on the latest with friends. Lots of photos. Then Katie fell asleep in my arms {I do that to babies.... so cute} before it was time to go. Such a lovely way to spend a Sunday afternoon on a long weekend.

Enjoy the rest of it peeps.

Bx

How long does it take....

To get hair like this (50+ teeny, tiny braids).....


To look like this....

2 and a half hours... yep. Almost 3 hours watching Scooby Doo and Princess Barbie...

Kaela is SO MUCH BETTER at having her hair done than she once was. When she was smaller I hated doing her hair. TEARS. Mama.... sob sob...Maaaammmaaaa. It was awful.

NOW... she is great, still needs a reassuring cuddle every now again... it will be finished sooooon. But 2.5 hours is a LLLLLooooonnnnGGG time for a five year old... and frustrating for me too.

She is such a cutie and she loves to have her long straight hair, even if it only lasts until she sleeps on it. Sweet.

Bx

This is what Sunday morning looks like...

To me.
Gorgeous.
Bx

Hey JUDE....

When I was 8 years old... I would listen to this song over and over again, relentlessly. Every night, over and over and over on my little record player beside my bed. It brought me peace and hope.

Hey Jude

Hey Jude, don't make it bad.
Take a sad song and make it better.
Remember to let her into your heart,
Then you can start to make it better.

Hey Jude, don't be afraid.
You were made to go out and get her.
The minute you let her under your skin,
Then you begin to make it better.

And anytime you feel the pain, hey Jude, refrain,
Don't carry the world upon your shoulders.
For well you know that it's a fool who plays it cool
By making his world a little colder.

Hey Jude, don't let me down.
You have found her, now go and get her.
Remember to let her into your heart,
Then you can start to make it better.

So let it out and let it in, hey Jude, begin,
You're waiting for someone to perform with.
And don't you know that it's just you, hey Jude, you'll do,
The movement you need is on your shoulder.

Hey Jude, don't make it bad.
Take a sad song and make it better.
Remember to let her under your skin,
Then you'll begin to make it
Better better better better better better, oh.
Naaa na na nananana, nanananaaa hey Jude...

I loved the build up of the song, how it started softly and slowly with words of pain....and built in to a crashing crescendo of hope, faith and conviction that everything was going to be fine.
That it was entirely up to Me to do so. That my life was in my hands.... that I could make of it whatever I chose to. That when I had my daughter I would let her under my skin. And in the time being... I was doing well.

But when I heard Nath had downloaded it onto my iPod... I skipped it. The first few bars were enough to make my heart ache {still do some days}... but today I was brave and I listened to the whole song.
And I became proud of that little 8 year old child... what a kewl little kid. She knew what was going on.
Proud and grateful that the *hell party life* the mid 20year old's that were my "parents" exposed me to, did not break my spirit.
And more than that I was the one to do the breaking... I totally broke the cycle. And that is why I believe in Destiny. 3 generations.... but not Me. Not my soul.

I have been thinking a lot lately about how life is....
Why is it that some women try SO hard to fall pregnant ~ that it is difficult for them?
That there are women who go on IVF for years... then they finally fall pregnant and have a stillbirth? **
Why?
Why is it that some women are heroin addicts, neglect their children, even abuse them at times, easily fall pregnant and have a handful of beautiful and gorgeous kids?
Well I dont know the answer. But I am very grateful.... otherwise I would not be here. And She would not be here. A friend said to me recently that I am "amazing"... that I am proof that Good Rises.

I think Hope Floats {and I like that movie}...
I say we all have a cross to bear.
I wish that we may bear it well and learn, and teach.
And ultimately understand and be grateful for the cross(es) in our life.
We are living.
Striving to be the best we can be... each and every day.

I try {somedays... hard} to appreciate that everyone has a cross to bear and not to judge, just accept and Be.
And that includes my Ma.... her cross is a big one.
But aside from it all I knew she loved me, deeply and passionately and with affection which was sweet and childlike. In a way in which my friends would envy and say.... "my Mum is not like that with me".
She just didnt love herself. But I always did. And do. I love you Mum. Always.
You have taught me so many things... mainly to love myself, whatever day it is. To BE the good bits of You. And to channel the energy of wanting more of a particular kinda Mum... to being a particular kinda Mum.
Peace, love and acceptance to all.

**{She just had a very healthy little boy… a couple of days ago *sweet*}
Bx

Updated Calendar....

Trying to be a little more organised....
I will add this to the sidebar to the right beneath the "Moi" heading soon - for future reference.

SUCH FUN...
Bx

Elsie Flannigan coming to Oz....

Me oh my.
How exciting.
This little pocket rocket is coming down under.
She will be here: November 17-19 in Sydney
I have searched the Creating Keepsakes site, nothing up yet.
But as soon as it is posted.
I am there.
Sold.
Kewlio.
Bx

Scrapping JOY...

I SO love being able to go home for lunch....
Hang with my guy, or just have some space to myself.
And I luuuurrrvvvvveee getting scrapping supplies half way through my "real work" day !!
But I gotta say - I PARTICULARLY LOVE today..... take a look at what arrived in the mail.
Ta-dah!
Makes it real now.
I can not wait.

As far as scrapping goes... this is the MOST exciting thing to happen for me and my besties in ages, if ever !...{well it is} !

Ali and Cathy are coming to Australia in August and we are going......to Sydney for the weekend.

We are just so lucky we even knew about it.
If it were not for my blogging, we wouldnt know.

Like when Becky came in 2004, or Heidi in 2005 - we didnt know until afterwards.

But this time we knew... and we were able to register pretty much as soon as tickets went on sale in March. And they went pretty quick. There was a little panic involved.

Yah for blogging {grin}.
Again... my blogging world helping me to realise my dreams and passions.
And another reason to be grateful and another sign that I am on the right path… for me.

So it wont be long now and we will have a couple of nights away from the demands of "Mama...Mama" - some girlie, inspiring, creative - scrap time.
And meet the women who inspire us so.
Heaven.

Peace.

Bx

My Sister's Birthday....

She is 32 years old today. Happy Birthday Meeges.

She likes to act tough.
She is not tough.
She is a softy.

Totally.

A beautiful soft, gorgeous... talented and sweet Goddess.
With a kind and thoughtful soul.....

And just is.
Megan.

Happy Birthday Meeges.
I love you.
Bx

Right on track....

Ever had that feeling that you are right on track. That nothing is going to hold you back.

That every step you are taking is part of the puzzle of your life... and you are putting all the pieces exactly where they go...

That is where I am today.

Thought I would share a couple of special things for me today:

1. Barb:: JinkyArt and IttyBittyActions :: extraordinaire sent a response to a few questions I had .... Her response was both inspiring and encouraging. AND complimentary of MY photos... WOWsers. SHE ~ a Goddesss of photography ~ complimented little ole me... I am so so humbled.
2. A poem I received from Daily Guru...

ACT ON YOUR DREAMS
Your destiny is not a matter of chance,
it's a matter of the choices you're going to make.
It's not something you wait for,
but rather something you pursue.
Don't wait for extraordinary opportunities.
Seize common occasions and make them great.
Opportunities sometimes come disguised in the form of misfortune,
or temporary defeat.
You're at this moment,
standing right in the middle of opportunity.
You must make your own opportunities.
Start where you are.
You can live your dreams if you act on your opportunities.

Again I am feeling that this blogger universe I have created fuels my conviction of my instincts, of the road I am travelling. Whatever direction... whatever I do. I know it will be right for me. And my family.
Peace and Love beautiful peeps.
Bx

Growing...Loving...Learning....

Everyday.
Leoni has posted about her exhibition. Beautiful. Accurate. True. Gorgeous.
And I am SO humbled by her mention of me... I feel SO special to receive such a gorgeous comment from such a Goddess.

There are so many exciting and peaceful happenings for me of late. Even the big scary stuff... it just is. I am amazed at the elegant simplicity of my gliding through my days at the moment. Pure grace... It is wonderful.
I am reaching so many gorgeous souls in my recent days and weeks. And they are reaching out to me... and that is so sweet.

Are you a person who often reaches out?
Or are you someone who expects to be reached out to?
Or are you balanced...?
I am definitely becoming more balanced with these amazing souls I am connected with... The mutal giving and receiving. Some are new and some are old… and a rejuvenation of our love for each other is occurring. It is so special… pure simplicity.

It is so sweet to get a thoughtful email. A note that lets you know someone is thinking of you…
but if you are the one to always send those…
or the one to always receive those…
That is not balance. That is not fair, respectful or loving. There needs to be equal give and take.
So… I am going to spend less time reaching out to people who are incapable of doing the same.
Give them space... perhaps one day they will be able to meet me in the same space.
For now I am going to spend more time just being.
Just Be Me.
And enjoy, celebrate and nurture the mutual reaching and giving I have going on in my life today.
I am so grateful for these brave, amazing, self-aware, true souls I have been blessed to have as my friends.

BTW... No ~I am not pregnant *grin*~

{Edit: Actually it is impossible for me NOT to reach out to people, it is just me.... it is who I am... a part of me and I accept it gratefully. It is my gift... when in balance *grin* and in direct balance to the good energies I receive in return}
Love, Joy and Peace…

Bx

Emotional Freedom Technique....

I mentioned some time ago that my friend Vanessa is becoming a life coach... and that she was coaching me.
The name of her practice is Love2Live, such a great name.
When the webpage is happenin', I will definately link you.

Anyways V coaching me didnt work out.
A valuable lesson learnt for us both.
We are too close as friends to mix in that kind of dynamic.

But we are still doing that kinda work.
Together.
And part of that journey is the Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT - wikipedia).
We are attending a workshop at the coast next month.
~I am really looking forward to it~.

And I met a friend of Leoni's on Sunday... Michelle, we talked for a good half hour - and guess what?
Yes - she is going too.
And Leoni's womens circle also practices EFT.

Life.
Be brave... listen to that whisper of your soul.
Follow it.
Believe it.
Know it to be true.

I was supposed to go with a friend to Leoni's exhibition... but she didnt feel well.
I could have not gone.
I could have had an inability to go alone.
I could have stayed at home.
So not me... but I was nervous... a little.

But I knew I had to go..... my soul was not just whispering this to me... it was Roaring.
I was excited... and actually ~I really needed to go alone~
This is my journey... my life.
And it is exciting and challenging.
Sometimes difficult, mostly beautiful.

The photo above of Mikaela hitting me with a bamboo stick... perhaps a five year olds very own EFT? She is mucking about while we try to take some nice {sit still} photos.... she makes me laugh, so much. Pretty much all the time. Laugh or yell....Its all good. And I really like this photo... a moment captured of us mucking about... as we do *grin*
Peace Out....
Bx

A Shooting Star...

On Sunday night....
The night of Leoni's exhibition.
The day that we met.
I was thinking of She and Deni at the time.
General good thoughts, sisterhood, Gods and Goddesses... the energies of our earths love.
Specifically I was thinking of her art bringing Goddesses together... uniting peeps.
Of meeting Leoni because of Deni, because Deni brought us together.

As I looked up into the nights sky I saw a large, bright shooting Star.
The largest shooting star I have ever seen.
Okay... obviously it is a meteor, but I like the term "shooting star" much better.

That is the third one I can vividly recall sighting.
I took that as a very very good spiritual sign.
I was grinning and the stars were too...
A beautiful and perfect moment.

The
future
belongs
to
those
who
believe
in
the
beauty
of
their
dreams

Joy....
Bx

BEing a Neglectaramo....

I was busy trying to load photos and add a post on Saturday night....
ABOUT how trully GRATEFUL I am for my life {and my love}....
Nath kept coming in to hurry me up.
I'd respond "I'll be there in a minute"... "It's the computer - it's so slow (it was being unusually slow)"
Finally I finished about 35-40 mins later.... to find my dear neglected love sitting sulking (and a little cranky) on the couch.

When I walked into the bathroom to see our beautiful claw footed bath full of steamy water, the room full with gorgeous lit candles... and soft sweet music playing..... WELL didnt I feel like a jerk!!

And rightly so.
Sorry babes...
Next time... I promise I'll click on the "Save as Draft" button.
And live and enjoy the moment... the sweetest moments you give me.
Thankfully Nath accepts an apology and moves on quickly.
But sometimes guys are too subtle... I certainly would NOT have been so subtle if Nath were on the computer... that is for sure!!
Thanks ~I love you~ you are the best.
Bx

Luminous Leoni...

So I went to HER Gallery exhibition yesterday... and it was GORGEOUS.
SHE was Gorgeous.
And her man {Chris} is so sweet and proud.
It was just lovely.
A nice drive just outta the 'burbs... and over a single car suspension bridge...
I got teary as I drove up to the gallery.
I sensed (correctly, d'uh) that the car in front of mine ... with three women, two younger... were also going to see Leoni's creations.
I felt she was uniting people with her art.
I felt Deni sending her love to Leoni.
It was beautiful.
And so was she.
I was so excited to meet her...
Proud.
My first blogger friend I have met in 'real life'... a sister...
And a wise one ~ JOY IS TOTALLY A CHOICE ~ totally.
Leoni made a terrific speech and I was so impressed by this young Goddess before me, well beyond her years.
I so want to get one of her pieces for Kaela's bedroom, to inspire the Goddess within my child.
Peace and Love.
Bx

A Usual Saturday...

Today has been a great day. A beautiful day.
A day where in the quiet of the evening, as Nath and I prepare a lovely dinner, drink a glass of red wine and listen to some 'big band' music.... I sit in a moment of contemplation and I think "I am living the life I always imagined I would"!! "I have the daughter I always dreamed of" and "I am with the man I always imagined I would be with"... a man who is SO GREAT and can NOT sing... but does... to me - always.

Some days... I didnt really dare believe this could be my life. But this is the life I wanted. This is the life I have. And I thank God for blessing me. I thank God for making me the woman I am...

Ohhhhh - I know some of my postings are in the very least a bit boring to others... maybe a bit repetitive... but geez... I am SO grateful. And I will scream it from the top of our most beautiful mountains for the rest of my life. I love and am so grateful for every single shitty experience I have ever had. A believer in fate. In Destiny. From a very young age.

Edit: I have added the words to one of my favourite songs by Clare Bowditch, suits this post nicely.

On This Side
We are living in a treehouse
In the middle of the 'burbs.
We've got two kids now - he says he wants a third.
Well I would give this man most anything he asks
'Cause I never did imagine
How green grows the grass.

On this side, things they work differently.
Me oh my, we are all that we hoped we'd be
'Cause this time, we dared to believe.

Well it wasn't always this way,
I can tell you that for sure.
Once the only colour I knew was grey.
My heart was low, it was poor.
Felt that nobody could love me
The way that I loved them.
that was before him.

On this side, things they work differently.
Me oh my, we are all that we hoped we'd be
'Cause this time, we dared to believe.

Why do we forget how to be loved?
Why do we bother doing it was simply getting off?
I'm not talking making babies,
Thought that is also true
It's whatever you call that thing
I'm in when I'm in with you

On this side, things they work differently.
Me oh my, we are all that we hoped we'd be
'Cause this time, we dared to believe.

It's a quiet night at home now.
Little miracles in bed
And a birdy on my window sill.
That makes happy happen in my head.
It's funny all the little things,
So boring to describe,
They taught my joy her roots,
And they brought my life alive.

On this side, things they work differently.
Me oh my, we are all that we hoped we'd be
'Cause this time, we dared to believe.

Love, Love, Love that song.... play it all the time, really loud and Mikaela and I bop along. And Mikaela says "Play it again Ma"
Love and Peace.
Bx

Beautiful women....

...share my life, my dreams, my hurts and pains.
And for this I am blessed.
Compassionate and warm women who I am honoured to know.
When you share your troubles.... they are lessened.
Your friendships are true.

This friend of mine did so in tears recently and honoured her right to do so, with dignity and grace. She is beautiful. And again I feel blessed. I think we all felt honoured by her words, her truth. Somedays are hard. But easier with friends.

There to Here
You ask me how we got from there to here,
And you tell me you can't remember,
And so I'll answer it for you,
Though perhaps not the way you want me to.

We got from here to there on the back of a unicorn racing through our dreams,
We got from here to there when night's silence thundered between us,
We got from here to there believing a song to be stronger than the worlds pulling us apart.

And we were right.
We stood in good relation to the earth,
We stood in good relation to the gods,
We stood in good relation to all that was beautiful,
You see, we were Alive

We got from there to here when we believed reality to be stronger than love,
We got from there to here when we forgot to look up and believe that gravity held no hold on our souls,
We got from there to here when we left our storybooks for some other distracting play,

And now I do not know my world,
And I cannot find my God,
And beauty dies,
Shut out in the cold.

And I believe we can get from here to there if we just believe,
And I believe we can get from here to there if you'll take my hand,
And I believe we can get from here to there - if only in our dreams,
And when you're dancing across the sky,

Somewhere between the stars and the moon,
Look for me by your side,
I'll meet you with hands outstretched,
We'll go - from here to there,
there to here, and back again. by Lauriel Mariondatter

An ode to my beautiful friends... women of strength, compassion and warmth.
And dramas in their lives... we are Alive
Peace and Love
Bx

Magic...

I found this piece of magic today.
My 2005 scrapbook title page has this passage from him.

"I am just like everyone else who listens to their heart:
A person who is enchanted by the mystery of life.
Who is open to Miracles,
Who experiences joy and enthusiasm for what they do.
Its just that the Other,
afraid of disappointment, kept me from taking Action."

2005 is the year Nath and I met and fell inlove.
Choose Joy.
Bx

Our front gate on a rainy day...

Looking outward
The open day is bright with pictures for everyone,
when green fields appear on the distant plain,
before the light of evening yields to twilight,
and reflections of light alleviate the noise of the day.
The inner being of the world often appears clouded and hidden,
and people's minds are full of doubts and irritation,
but splendid nature cheers up their days, and doubt's dark questions stay distant.

Friedrich Hölderlin 1777-1843

I find the rain gloriously cleansing.
The droplets suspended above our front gate.... mesmirising.

Oiwww... Nath has just come home to have lunch with me. He thinks I look like Medusa. My ruly curly hair is all over the place. *grin*
Bx

WellBeing...

I recently got my latest copy of WellBeing. I love this mag. Sooooo really inspiring and there are so many facinating little (and whhhoooaa large) bits and pieces. I can read it over and over even issues from 12-15 years ago! In this issue there is an article on Creative Writing (and loads more), here is a particular quote I wanted to share:

Go within. Search for the cause, find the impetus that bids you to write. Does it stretch out its roots in the deepest place of your heart? Can you avow that you would die if you were forbidden to write? Above all, in the most silent hour of your night, ask yourself this: Must I write? Dig deep into yourself for a true answer. And if it should ring its assent, if you can confidently meet this serious question with a simple 'I must', then build your life upon it.

-Rainer Maria Rilke (1875-1926), Letters to a young poet.

How gorgeous.
I love it.
I am by no means a terrific writer, or a poet.
But I love to write.
As I love to take photos.
And I appreciate how fortunate I am that I can do both... often badly, sometimes well and occasionally there is a pearl... and I am really excited.
Passionate regardless.
Imagine getting a note like this... how inspiring? Its inpiring for me to read, perhaps for you?... imagine if you were the one it was actually written for?

Today I am working from home... and its about that time I go make my morning coffee...
Faith peeps. Enjoy today.
Bx