I am home...

What an amazing experience the past few days has been! I cant even begin to explain how I have been spiritually touched.

Brett was the first young and "live life to the fullest possible" kinda person I know to die. There was alot of warmth at the funeral.... 250-300 peeps. Huge wake. He is a very loved and a warm person. I was unaware that he was also a freemason. During the ceremony attending freemasons were asked to stand. And I felt an amazing and powerful energy as they did so.

When his Mum {Sandy} died almost three years ago... he and his bro {Wade} basically said to themselves "fuck buying a house".... "lets live our lives to the fullest" "lets get a boat" !! They bought a "little" $100k "boat". They believe that money is nothing compared to living. So right. And thankfully Wade has LOTS of good memories fishing with his best mate/brother.

This may sound strange... Brett's death has given my family a gift... and I am very proud of the spiritual warmth they all showed and expressed over this last week. All of us connected.

I also connected with some amazing people... his mates. Plus two incredibly soulful and spiritual women. Sharon and Lydia. Just amazing.

Wade and Bec are very beautiful souls and my thoughts are with them constantly now.

On Saturday night my sister Leanne and I both saw shooting stars. Lee first and me about half an hour later. We were speaking of Brett and appreciating having had him in our lives. For the gift he was and is in our lives. The aborigines believe that when a person passes, the next shooting star you see is the persons spirit or soul returning to the earth. Blessed are we for the lessons Brett is teaching us.

Before the funeral service I was trying to be brave... I felt I had no "right" to be feeling deeply affected by Brett's death. Not like Wade (or Dad)... where the impact for them would be so MUCH more than for me. In reality I have found that Brett's death has impacted me profoundly. He was an integral part of my family. He was like spiritual glue, holding so many people together and connected. And now another person is missing from the equation. Another gap or void is in our lives. But the negative has come with postives... and I suppose I can feel the blessings from Brett as I am not as engrossed in grief as I would be if I saw him or connected with him daily, or often... but still grieving. And it comes in waves. Sometimes I feel okay and other times really S.A.D. Mostly right now I am just really tired. It is an intersting, painful and still blessed journey.

LOVE - the word art in the photo above - I bought that in a market in Queensland. A constant reminder of the most important thing... and of Brett too.

I love you Brett ~I hold you in my heart~
Peace and Love

Edit: To those of you who have been sending me beautiful heartfelt emails... thanks so much.
EDIT AGAIN.... I REALLY think I have fixed the issue on not being able to leave comments now (2 Aug)... DOH!!

Bx

Just had to share this....

My reason to believe {and proof} that there is mainly good in this world...
I will find it awfully hard to be without her over the next few days.
And miss my cuddles and kisses from her and Nath.
But I will have my Dad and sisters to give and receive them instead.

Bx

Loss...

I wont be posting this week.

My little (step) bro ~Brett~ died in a motorcycle accident yesterday.

So I am going up north to Queensland to be with my Dad, his brother Wade and my sisters.

The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left
unsaid and deeds left undone. Harriet Beecher Stowe

Seeing death as the end of life is like seeing the horizon
as the end of the ocean. David Seals

Peace and blessings to you all.
Bx

Tonight is ALL about HER...

Friday nights are our "Mall Rat" experience. And most the time I drag {well not literally!} my little princess about Scrapping shops and things *I* want to do. Tho I DO let her go to the pet store and the toy sections.

But tonight, well tonight its gonna be ALL about HER.
Cause she is beginning (oh who am I kiddin, she has been for a while) to look like Steve Urkle.... you know the kid with his pants half way up his shins. Wikipedia refers to them as "high-water" pants. Yep - I am a BAD Mum!!

So we are off to pumpkin patch {love their stuff} to get a few very lovely outfits.... she is QUITE the fashionista!
She also needs some ballet shoes and stockings... maybe even a new leotard!

THEN... and HERE is when it gets really exciting. Maccas (NO - thats not it.. we always do that on a Friday night)....
We are going to the MOVIES to see Over the Hedge.
We saw Cars a few weeks ago and she enjoyed that.
But OTH is on LATE peeps...8.15pm. So we will see how we go.

And Nath is coming too.
He does join us on our "Mall Rat" experience sometimes.
And kids movies... well how can one resist.

BTW... just so you KNOW (and I hope you DO KNOW)... I am not ALWAYS happy !
I have anxieties, and insecurities, that ugly little critical voice... and enough tramatic experiences to cause me to be struck with fear... but I have worked hard to move beyond that stuff... not to allow that stuff to define me as a person. Because I am so much more than those bad experiences.
Perhaps little by little I will share those things...
Its just that I choose not to. Not to be struck with fear that is. I choose Joy....

~ I am just so grateful for my life, my daughter, my guy and my sistas~
For all the work I have done to get myself to HERE.
For BEING here... LOVING here.
And I will NEVER take it for granted .... ever.
Thats all.

Love and jOy to all you lovely angels.
I hope you have a lovely Friday night... and whatever you do tonight ~ I hope its what You WANT to Do (with all your hearts)~
Bless you.
Bx

Simple things make me happy....

These are a few of the VERY simple things that are making me happy TODAY:

:: Ali's {latest} book arrived... do you like how I had our bathroom painted to co-ordinate ?? (bahahhaaaa)

:: Catching up with my friend Jodes and her son Jake last night.... SO VERY special.

:: Catching up with Kyles and her clan today...

:: Arriving home to the delivery of Ali's book, which I had been eagerly anticipating!! This caused a minor stress attack in which I had to call Kyle to talk me through (sad I know *grin). Reason I could NOT read the book then and there was for the following reason....

:: Having an appointment with my accountant (not Nath)... and being told I am getting a nice return... so in the end it was ALL good.

:: Winning our touch footy game 6-0 - our team that is, not ME... NOTHING to do with me, trust me. All I do is shuffle about *griN*

:: Having pizza and a few giggles with She and He before putting Mikaela to bed. Tonnes a kisses. Sweet child o mine.

:: Soaking in the bath for AGES reading Ali.

:: Nath being totally sweet {AND glued to 24}... so letting me do my thang!

Life is ~TOTALLY BRILLIANT~ SO looking forward to my Sunday - scrap day with my groovy gals.

So very kewl.

Peace, love and sighs of contentment.

And a GOOD nights sleep!

Bx

Move by yourself...

To my darling sisterhood and blogger world.
I have a little gift for you.
Download this TOTALLY ROCKIN' song***.
By this very kewl dude.

And play it really LOUD.
And dance girls... DANCE.
I am ... and I am dancing with all of you when I do.

Groove Girls....
Pump it LOUD>>>>>
Now....... Move your body!!

Feels so good.... and I can just see my sisterhood dancing about with me.
JOY.

Love, funky tunes and dancing to you sweet womyn...
Bx

A weekend of...

Friday... Nath's parents arrived.
Saturday... I drove down to the coast by myself {I love long drives alone}... attended an EFT workshop with Maggie Adkins.

It was great. I practiced on Mikaela early Monday morning... and it worked brilliantly. Cant wait to do Levels 2 & 3. My lovely friend Vanessa introduced me to EFT. Thanks V x. During one of breaks we did a photo session.. this is one of the many shots I took of her. She is so gorgeous!

That evening when I got home Nath and I went to his parents hotel and had dinner with them there... before walking into the city for tea, coffee and cake. We exchaged our travel photos... Jean and Dusan had been to America and Europe in March/April of this year... and Nath and I went to Thailand over Christmas/New Year, while Mikaela was in Europe with her Dad {I can not believe its already 7 months ago now!! and I am NO WHERE near getting our albums done}

Sunday... a sleep in *grin* pottered about at home for a bit before Nath's parents came over. Nath and Dusan went out to the Wig & Pen. While Jean and I went to do some crafty shopping and pedicures before going to collect Mikaela. Back home and more hangin'.

Maree and Lily arrived in the late afternoon..... and Lily is JUST SO CUTE.
































And, mmm, I cant be sure, but I think Nath is getting a *little* clucky. So sweet.



We had a lovely roast. But a bit of a hectic experience for me as my little girl was totally excited, very overtired and got herself into a bit of a state.



We woke VERY early to get Maree to the airport. Was so great to see them again, even if only briefly.

Jean and Dusan came over for dinner last night... simple pasta and porteguese tarts... yum! A quiet evening compared to the previous. At the end of the evening it was sad to say goodbye. It would be so nice if we lived closer. They are lovely peeps. And I know Nath realises he is very blessed to have them.


And today... lots of beautiful email banter with the lovely Leoni, Kyle, Jodes and Kimbo.
So all busy, busy... and lots of love.
Peace and Joy angels.
Bx

Congratulations....

To Dalisay, Mikey and little bro James, on the arrival of Mia:
Name: Mia Elizabeth Krege
Length: 52 cm
Weight: 3.51 Kg
Time of Birth: 8.25AM
DOB: 17 July 2006

Exciting stuff.

And my darling friend Kimbo and her man Sime... just bought a house together.

Feeling the love and joy all around.
Bx

Puzzle...

some seem to be born with a nearly completed puzzle.
and so it goes.
souls going this way and that,
trying to assemble the myriad of parts.

but know this.
no one has within themselves all the pieces to their puzzle.
like before the days when they used to seal jigsaw puzzles
in cellophane insuring that all the pieces were there.

everyone carries with them at least one
and probably many pieces to someone else's puzzle.
sometimes they know it.

sometimes they dont.

and when you present your piece
which is worthless to you,
to another,
whether you know it or not,
whether they know it or not,
you are a messenger
from the Most High. ~Lawrence Kushner

I was stalking this site... and came across this poem and had to post here... because it is beautiful. I love it.

For a long time I thought that I had to be "whole" before I would be able to find love. Perfectly "whole".
It took me a while before I came to the conclusion that in actual fact - none of us is "whole". We are not islands... we transform... daily, we grow... and we are interconnected !

We are individuals.
We have our own souls.
We do not become one.
I believe that.

And I believe that we have pieces to each others puzzles.
We need a village of people to live happily... not just one person.
A tribe of confidants... people you are totally honest with, trust totally. And love loyally.

A remarkable thing occured to me this week....
The depth of friendship and love was shown to me... brought to me.

Sometimes change can be very difficult...
And we must all grow from the catepillar to the butterfly.
In our own way.
And in our own time.
I think I forgot that for a little while.

Often I provide advice to friends {usually they ask for it, sometimes they dont}
My words are accurate... and I try to convey them with love.
But the real gift is to recognise when a person is ready to hear particular words.
To be mindful.

It does not make them wrong.
Just on their own path.
As is meant to be.
We are all divine spirits.
Doing the best we can.

Loving honestly, treading lightly and accepting that ~what will be will be~.

AND I TOTALLY love Jen's post on JEALOUSY... take a look at that! Really thought provoking, and accurate!

Peace and love my comrades...
Bx

Sydney...

As promised... a few photos and a run down of our weekend away... We stayed at the Sir Stampford in Double Bay... G O R G E O U S **


Saturday arrived in Sydney in the late afternoon. Got a pedicure {which cost a mint and took forever.. but moi toes looked pretty}! My sisters (Lee and Katie) came to the hotel to get ready.....
but Katie had to nick off to join us again later {such a 23 year old...busy busy} !!






















We met Mossy, Nina, Phil and Ingrid at James Squire on the waters edge....an amazing place to be. I sat outside... overlooking Sydney Harbour.... chatting with my sister Lee. It was spectacular... a really beautiful sight. We had a few drinks there and watched {well I didnt really.... I talked} the footy. Before heading off to dinner.... at Kingsleys Steakhouse... and it was delicious! The steak was amazing... and the red wine very nice. The view was even more spectacular than at the bar... A good evening... with a party of about 14 peeps... the four sisters, partners and some friends. We had a fun night... after dinner we went onto the The Loft for a drink (lovely interior) ...

Sunday..... walk down to Double Bay...
































where my guy took this photo of me {he is a fine photographer}














A bitta shopping and brunch at a local cafe.

To the SCG ....where Adelaide slaughtered the Swans.... oiw yeah!

SUCH FUN watching a live game... 36,000 peeps going off. A great VIBE... AFL really is a magic game.
















That night my little sis {Lee} made us a Sunday Roast...
which was amazing. Thanks Beautiful Woman!









Monday - took Nath's car in for a service. And got a lovely replacement car to cruise about in for the day. Then on for .....shopping, shopping and more shopping @ Bondi Junction. Nath got himself some new shirts.... all very nice for a new Partner!!

The thing I love the most about our weekends to Sydney...is the drive....3 hours ... chatting and being... together.

We got back to Canberra late afternoon.... eager to see Mikaela. When she saw us she mearly looked up and smiled. Then continued with her drawing and colouring in. Thats my Girl !

I hope everyone had a beautiful weekend. Peaceful, content and serene.

Edit: Now that I have only just got around to posting LAST weekends events... another weekend is almost upon us!! Nath's parents arrive tonight from Adelaide for the weekend... I have an Emotional Freedom Techniques EFT conference on Saturday, which is sure to be an experience.

And I have had some powerful experiences with a few amazing women this week... really big exciting stuff for sure. I am just marinating in my grattitude... for me and them. I will post soon.

Oh... and Kyles is up in Cairns.. (Far North QLD). Naturally she found a little gallery (and bought a painting)... you can see the work here... really BEAUTIFUL - they are embellished with jewels and the eyes have big beautiful eyelashes extending from the canvas... sweet. Cant wait to see.

Bx

**Also a sad reminder of a terrible and tragic loss... {though indeed VERY Rock Star-esque}

SHE has a blog....

SHE is my HERO.
SHE is taking photos of She, He and I {us} ... very soon.
And I cant wait. I hope I can string two words together on the day... I do that with peeps I admire.
Funnneee for them... not so much for me!
Bx

This is what an accounting firm Partner looks like...

.... remarkably like my Nathan... wowsers!
The word is out, it is "official" now.

Nathan is a partner at Bates and Pickering Chartered Accountants. 20 years and only two partners.. and now Nath is joining the team.

Its BIG and SCARY... and I am SO VERY PROUD of my guy. He took the leap... he did it.

And this Daily Guru message is just for you my love:

SUCCESS IS A DOOR YOU WALK THROUGH
You must move toward success, it doesn't come to you.
The golden opportunity you're seeking lies within you.
It's not in your surroundings.
It's not in luck or chance, or the help of others.
It's in you alone.
Opportunities are all around you.
You can develop them if you apply persistence to your possibilities.
If the door of opportunity appears closed,
just keep knocking on it, and keep knocking on it until it opens.
Be an opener of doors.

Nath has been receiving so many lovely emails from the community.... and I am so happy for him.
It is a great time for him and for us... and his parents are coming over this weekend to help celebrate.
Happy Happy..... Joy, Joy.
Bx

He is Perfect for Me...

And this is just another example of why I know so....
The other night, Nath wanted to share a song with me from his new Live CD, Songs From Black Mountain....

Live - Get Ready
Come on, get ready
This is the spring of our love
Come on, get ready
Feels like it's ordained from above
We have the power
To do what we came to do
This is the hour
The sun is shining on you

The future is now
The past is gone forever
We can come together
The light is our way
The future is now
The past is gone forever
We belong together
Get ready
Come on, get ready

The beach is washing away
Come on, get ready
The high tide of our love is here to stay
We will have the power
To do the good and the true
This is the hour
The whole world is waiting for you

The future is now
The past is gone forever
We can come together
The light is our way
The future is now
The past is gone forever
We belong together
Get ready
Get ready
Get ready

The future is now
The past is gone forever
We can come together
The light is our way
The future is now
The past is gone forever
We can come together
The light is our way

The future is now
The past is gone forever
We belong together
Get ready
Get ready
Get ready
Get ready

Our home was quiet and peaceful when Nath put the acoustic version of this song on for me.
We sat on the couch and gazed deeply into each others eyes.
He had found "our" song. Or another. Or THE song.....
And just like he is to me.... it is.... PERFECT. I love it.
And if you get a chance to listen to this ... I recommend you do.

Right this moment I am looking forward to:

• My Friday night "Mall Rat" experience with Mikaela...
• Spending the weekend in Sydney with Nath and catching up with my sisters and friends up there. Drinks, Dinner, Footy and pedicures....

I will be sure to post HEAPS of photos next week.

And thanks to Deni... who inspired this post *sweet* today, though it was percolating in my thoughts...
Peace, Love and Blessings....
Bx

This inspires me...

Even in literature and art, no man who bothers about originality will ever be original: whereas if you simply try to tell the truth (without caring twopence how often it has been told before) you will, nine times out of ten, become original without ever having noticed it.

C. S. Lewis - Irish essayist & juvenile novelist (1898 - 1963)

Create today... love and peace.
Bx

A new financial year...

Can you tell I am shacked up with an accountant? *grin* How is it that we are half way through 2006... already.

Things I am grateful for today (especially):

• My little girl - who told me this morning she loves me like a Big Big Rainbow. BLESS.
• My darling guy who says to me "As the Beatles said All you need is love…Love is all you need"
• I have a scrap haven... a room, my room... in which I can escape to (but not too often or my guy feels neglected).
• That my guy feels neglected if I scrap all hours and ignore him... *smile*... I am not so grateful at the time (its always when my "save the world" with this piece of ART - creative inspiration has hit) ... but afterwards, and with some thought as to how I would feel if he did NOT (shock horror) miss me... hmm. Very grateful.
• Seeing the beauty, the good... the wonder in every day life. Today.
• Emails from Kylie, Stella, Naomi and Leoni - having great friends that make you smile and laugh all the time.
• Ali - so talented - so inspiring - so cant wait to meet her!! SO love her post today! Gave me goose bumps and made me grin my head off (tis possible, trust me!)
• Kaela spending time with her Dad (so very important)... and enables -
• Nath and I having some US TIME and going out for Indian!
• Watching an episode of "Love My Way" while doing our ironing.

So that about sums up my day today.
I am a lucky, lucky woman... no doubt about it.
OH and YESTERDAY..... my car - parked in the two hour car park for about 7 hours - no ticket! Amazing!
No - more like Karma for the 10s of tickets I have received for being 5 minutes over.... but still peeps - a blessing just the same *grin*....
Gotta run... time for dinner.
Bless. Peace. Love.
Bx

SHE is pregnant....

Ms Clare Bowditch.
So so sweet this woman. And her back up vocalist (Libby Chow) is also. Both of them. How cute!

But first I will give you a brief run down of the evening:
Di had two friends, Eileen and Steph... who didnt actually have tickets. So while Di and I sat inside all warm drinking beer and eating yummy antipasta (and being asked by a hundred peeps "are these chairs taken").... Eileen and Steph stood outside in the freezing bloody cold hoping to get tickets.

By the time Dan Kelly was 10 minutes into his set... it was pretty obvious that it was a full house... and most the peeps waiting outside were not going to get in. Nah Uh... not the girls we are holding chairs for!!! So I went to speak with the hottie at the door..... and I got Eileen and Steph inside. Whoo Hoooo. SO happy about that for two reasons:

1. the girls got inside outta the cold and enjoy Clare (and not freeze their butts for over an hour for NOTHING)!
2. I still got it !!! Yep I do. Ah it is the simple things in life hey!

So anywhoooo.... when it came time to sing "On This Side"... and the boyz in the band left the stage.

Clare annonced that she and Libby would do a magic trick! She explained that although it appeared there were only two of them on stage.
There was in fact four.
"One in there and one in here" she said pointing to each of their belly's.
So so so sweet.
Everyone Cheered and Yahhoooooed of course.

Such a beautiful night.
Really.
Beautiful.

So I had a chat with Clare after the show. And we got a (really bad) photo taken together.
She remembered Mikaela... but of course *grin*
And naturally I congratulated her on her pregnancy... SO KEWL !
Bx

Pizza and Friends....

We had Dave, Di, Jasmin and Eliza... And Dal, Mikey and James (plus still in Mum's tum - almost due to arrive, Mia) over for dinner last night. I made (way to many) gourmet pizza's...

It was a most enjoyable night just catching up... with a house full of children and laughter.
I have known these friends for some 10 years and it is lovely to walk this journey of our lives together.

Nath bonded with Dave via his light saber... very cute little Star Wars nerds are they!! (Kyles is too). Funny.

Gives me the feeling of being grateful and blessed once again.
Life is simple really. And I like that very much.... life's simple pleasures. Like two little girls jumping on the bed.


Tonight I am off to enjoy Clare Bowditch at Tilley's Devine Cafe with another Di. Total JOY !
Oh and today, Nath and I bought Kaela "I Like to Sing" CD by Justine Clarke... I guess that will be my entire listening pleasure in the car from now until eternity!! Lucky for us... I love it too.
Bx